Yesterday, a day which is always highly revered by teams of the South County Fantasy Football League, some of the finest football minds in all of North America, sat huddled in the catacombs of Commissioner Craig Burian's residence to put together their 2008 team.
This great league, founded in1992, is made up of a polyglot of devious engineers, who worship at the altar of the names of yesteryear, Camp, Rockne, Yost, Crysler, Blaik, Bryant, Faurot and fashion their teams on this day, hoping "this is our year!"
They came down the stairs, from outback where their is an aroma eminating from the library on the hill with stacks of works by Shakesphere, Wardsworth, Hawthorne, Cooper and are welcomed by the vivacious mistress of the household, Laura Burian, who probably has more sports memorabilia put away than most macho men we know! The Assassins are there, the Villuns, yes the rugged Raiders, defending champion Gorillas (Apes), the BJ Rhinos, Kevin Garavaglia's Garvey team, almost a dynasty a few years ago, the Rams, Steelers, Marauders, Bud Lites, wow what a conglameration of characters, a veritable plethera of football treasure!
In they came, the coniving John Gianino, whispering possible trades of draft picks or hoping to move up or down with a pick that might land him a hard running back, maybe McFadden or what about Chris Johnson, who runs the 40 in 4:2 seconds, Bill Lee, who came in from Louisville yesterday to play some golf and is second guessing himself about allowing Donovan McNabb to go on the board and keeping Derick Anderson, and the Rams with ageless Paul Cross and Harold Hall, who never saw a Ram he didn't like but who is nervous about his QB Mark Bulger. Yep, and there is Joe Guttierez sporting a Kirby Puckett hair style! In comes Mike Hermannes and Tim Thomas of the always tough Raiders, confidently predicting victory this year. Back in the back, sit John G., Bill Lee, Commissioner Craig, Bill Metz and yes, Gary Greer is coming in. Mike Holzem knows his Marauders will be in it this year. Jeff Chestnus as always comes up with a star no one had heard of and may be a fantasy in itself. Your's truly, Coach Bob Christian is back sipping a good, hot, cup of special coffee so he won't doze off. After all, he's been up half the night, worrying about his Rhinos.
Commissioner Craig approaches the podium and Raider fans cell phones prepare for action.The name Reggie Wayne goes out to the highways and byeways and for four hours these football moguls fashion their teams. We will then select our starters and scribinees and the 2008 season will be upon us! Names like Ocho Cinco, Gentle Ben, TJ Housmandzadeh, Brodie, Donovan, Hussein (how'd he get in there) will be announced and the comments about these selections will have to be bleeped out at press conferences all over the area.
What a divine day and great gathering of some of the neatest people I know, competing with each other as if our lives depended upon it. It goes by too quickly and some of us, we worry about our fantasy baseball team's interests competing with those of our football squads.
You gotta love it but what are we doing with our time when there are so many other important hours and minutes to divide our interests. Well, like tonight, when its bedtime, it will be time for some fantasy sex!
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Nay oh GREAT COACH - I say NAY to Donovan (the GREATEST MARV... er, uh, VILLUNS QB ever) McNabb and YES to Derek Anderson. Lest ye not forget, this hearty proclamation comes AFTER seeing the revered D-Mac roll up 20 pts (while on the APES bench) against my beloved VILLUNS. The time for change has arrived in the VILL (just as it has for our Nation) - no Brian Brohm and no D Mac.
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